Jealousy is often regarded as a nasty emotion. It’s easily spotted in others but may be more challenging to recognize in yourself. Doing so can so easily point to insecurities and recognizing those areas where we could be better may make us feel inferior. So it’s easier to direct those very strong feelings outward and onto other people. But there are better ways to deal when the green-eyed monster appears. Here are five healthy ways to handle your jealousy.
Be Honest About It
Many don’t like to acknowledge any feelings of jealousy. It’s uncomfortable. And admitting that we’re longing for what someone else has can make us feel bad about ourselves. But ignoring the feeling or pretending it isn’t there, doesn’t remove it. Instead, being honest with yourself about the true nature of your feelings is the first step to addressing and even doing something about them. Feelings are there for a reason but they are fleeting and fickle. And they don’t always say something about our entire character as a person.
Get Clear About What You Want
On her podcast, “Closet Confessions,” British influencer and author Candice Brathwaite shares about her own jealousy and that she finds the emotion quite helpful. Once you’re honest about what you’re feeling, it can help you identify the things you want out of life. Seeing someone else with it doesn’t mean you don’t want them to have it. That’s envy. Feelings of jealousy simply mean you would like to experience that same thing as well. Knowing what you want out of life is the first step to putting together a plan to get it.
Remove Yourself If Necessary
If you find that the feelings of jealousy are consuming too many of your thoughts, take a step back. That can mean choosing not to see that person if their presence is a bit too triggering. Social media can make it difficult to cope with jealousy. It constantly highlights people’s lives in a glorious manner. It can make it feel like everyone else is always winning while you’re still trying to figure it out. Delete the apps for a while. Unfollow the people you only hate-watch. Unplug and get in touch with yourself in the meantime.
Take the Steps to Get What You Want
They say an idle mind is the devil’s workshop. It means that when you’re not busy doing something, you can easily sleep into the darkness. Nothing takes your mind off of your feelings, at least temporarily, like getting down to the work. Working to make your desires a reality will help you feel less insecure about your place in life and what you may not have achieved just yet. Assuring yourself that you’re moving in the right direction is a healthy way to handle your jealousy.
The best way to prove to the universe that you can handle more is to show appreciation for what you already have. You might not be where you want to be just yet. But chances are you’ve made progress in your life. And you can point to something you can be proud of. Focusing on what you do have, while you work toward what you want can make the journey much more pleasant.