For a very long time, I did everything I was supposed to do.

In the midst of all that “doing”, for years — I felt like something was missing. Being ambitious and high-achieving is great, but deep down I’ve always believed in living according to your purpose, not just your pockets. I felt like my purpose was stuck right there, deep down, hidden under the busy schedules, constant distractions and a million external opinions of what success was supposed to look like.

Finally I had enough, I got tired of feeling like I was throwing water into the ocean and I decided to prioritize my Being. I traded “To Do” lists for “To Be” lists. This didn’t mean I let go of to-do lists altogether, I just made them switch places. So instead of tricking myself into feeling important and productive just because I had a busy schedule, I started with what I truly valued: who I am and who I’m supposed to be — then built out the rest from there. This kept me in alignment. It kept the big picture in mind. It connected the dots, bringing deeper meaning into what I was already doing and exposed places that really needed my attention.

Here’s exactly how it helped me & hopefully how it can help you too:

Being in Career

When it came to my career I became a lot more aware of how my skills and tasks benefit my bigger picture, and I made changes where it didn’t. Now, I’m not just preparing for a presentation to impress a client — I’m being a more effective speaker.

Question: How does your work reflect who you are? 

If it’s not obvious now, think about how you can incorporate your Being into your workspace or change your workspace to incorporate your Being.

Being In Relationships

Starting with a focus on Being a better daughter, sister and friend helped add line items to my to-do list that probably wouldn’t have made it there otherwise — like, “go visit your mom this Sunday”.

Question: Who are you supposed to Be in your relationships? What can you Do to support that role?

Being just To Be

Sometimes just Being is enough. Be grateful, be excited, be concerned, be intentional. Whatever it is, just be aware of where you are and take in all that moment has for you.

Question: How do you want to feel at any given moment? What do the things you unexpectedly feel tell you about yourself?

Who You are and What You do are separate, but equal. You can’t have one without the other. I can’t say I’m one thing, but never do anything to support that and vice-versa. Both sides matter and it’s important to think of them individually so you keep yourself in check.

 

Focusing on Being gave so much more meaning to the life I already had and so much more clarity and confidence to create the life I wanted.

Hope this helps. Here’s to your Being.

-----

Sasha Matt is a Certified Life Coach who helps ambitious Millennials Break through their Blocks so they can Be who they’re #BuiltToBe and create the life that supports that.

Ready. Set. Boss. Our daily email is pouring out inspiration with the latest #BlackGirlBossUp moments, tips on hair, beauty and lifestyle to get you on track to a better you! Sign up today.

careerself-acceptancerelationshpsmindful livingself-awaremindfulnesslifelife coachbe