When it comes to being in a relationship with another human being, there are always opportunities to practice conscious choice, build compassion, let go of self-judgment, learn more about yourself and gain insight into non-serving patterns you have attached to that are no longer useful or valuable. In the midst of shifting who and how you are for the better, there will also be moments where you slip back into default ways of relating to yourself and others that might have proven beneficial or served as a barrier of protection before, but in the present are not warranted. Or, you might declare new values that you have every intention to align with, but there might be a moment where you act in a way contrary to your values. Practice patience with yourself. Basic human error exists, and none of us are exempt. This month I have been experiencing some rude awakenings and blatant lessons around the importance of trust, communication and transparency when in a relationship. 

Here are three keys that were birthed from my insights:

1. There can be a lot of self-judgment wrapped up in and on the other side of telling someone how you really feel about something. 

  1. Sometimes we assume that not communicating honestly is easier, but it's really an attempt at self-protection. Often in an attempt to protect ourselves from being vulnerable, we leave the relationship vulnerable to unnecessary ills. Let go and be real.

  2. 2. Granting yourself and whoever you are in a relationship with permission and space for natural, normal human error is super clutch. 

  3. None of us are perfect. We are all evolving, including YOU. So yes, we can offer understanding to ourselves and others even in the midst of growing, separately or together. Everyone falls back sometimes. Cutting yourself and each other some slack is necessary.

  4. 3. Transparency is the key to letting someone else see you. 

  5. Let them see you. If you want to build, want to grow, want to develop meaningful partnership and companionship, want to be more of who you say you want to be in the presence of yourself and those outside of you, then, you've got to let them see you. Let them know you. Let them feel you. You've got to let yourself see you. Let yourself know you. Let yourself, feel you.

  6. What are your essential keys to a healthy relationship? Tweet us and let us know @21Ninety!