Setting and establishing firm boundaries with energy vampires is one of the most proactive ways to create healthier relationships that can help to heal us rather than harm us. One of the best ways to know if you’re dealing with an energy vampire is if you always feel drained after you speak to them, if they constantly try to diminish your feelings, or are always trying to take more out of the relationship than they're giving.
Sometimes, the best course of action is to move on from these kinds of people, though it’s not always easy if you're dealing with family, a boss, or anyone that has significant importance within your life. Regardless of the circumstances, you have an opportunity to heal all of the relationships in your life, and this starts with you first.
People will only respect you as much as you respect yourself. Make it clear that respect is the only way it can work.
Oftentimes, one of the primary reasons energy vampires constantly take, is because you’re not drawing the line with them. It’s okay to let the other person know your wants and needs within the relationship and most importantly, that you are a person who should always be treated with the utmost respect. If they can't respect your needs and your boundaries, this is a clear indicator that they most likely won't respect you down the line, and in that case, it’s okay to let this person go.
Be direct and firm with your communication. Don't beat around the bush.
Due to people-pleasing, it’s sometimes hard to communicate true feelings and communicate in a way that makes your wants and needs crystal clear. It’s okay to say no without an explanation. It’s okay to be real with the people in your life. If they aren't open to authenticity, then that’s something for them to work through, not you.
Be assertive and don't give up your power.
People can only meet us as much as they’ve met themselves, and when it comes to energy vampires, they sometimes may not realize the damage they're causing within a relationship. Start off small by talking to them about how you feel within the dynamic. After you discuss your feelings you can then dive into how their behavior is impacting the connection. Our role within this plays a huge part as well so identify where you might have gone wrong and openly take accountability. This can change the space for others to also follow suit while creating a safer space to discuss difficult conversations and issues. Don't let up though, be firm, be assertive, and be true with how you really feel.
Offer an alternative to a problem, if they are unwilling to compromise then let them know that it’s time for the relationship to be severed.
Conflicts arise every single day, and sometimes there’s no coming back from them, however, if you have the opportunity to control what you can when it comes to creating solutions rather than more problems, this is a great way to take control over your own life rather than allowing someone to do it for you. Offering alternatives to problems can help the other see that you want to make the connection work out, but only if they are willing to meet you there. If not, feel liberated in letting them go.
Be consistent with your boundaries.
Consistency is the key to success in any area of our lives. If we only establish boundaries only a few times with energy vampires, this shows that they can easily crawl back in and try to manipulate the situation even more. Once you establish a clear border, you should feel free to establish even more. This is the only way the relationship will ever work out.