The Goldilocks Theory: Does Age Really Matter in Marriage?

As times change, so do our priorities. Marriage was once considered a milestone to reach as early as possible, but today, many women are choosing to wait. With career goals, financial stability, and personal growth taking center stage, more are saying “I do” in their late 30s or early 40s.

But according to the Goldilocks theory of marriage, the so-called perfect age to get married falls between 28 and 32. Research suggests that couples who tie the knot in this window have a lower risk of divorce and a higher chance of a lasting marriage. But why is that—and does age really make a difference?

What Is the Goldilocks Theory?

Studies show that marrying before 25 comes with a 38 percent chance of divorce within the first five years. This aligns with research on brain development—your frontal lobe, which governs decision-making, isn’t fully formed until your mid-20s. By waiting until ages 25 to 29, the divorce rate drops to 14 percent. If you hold off until 30 to 34, it dips even lower to 10 percent.

The Goldilocks theory suggests that getting married too early can mean rushing into a commitment before you’re fully self-aware. But waiting too long can also have risks—divorce rates start to tick back up for those who marry later in life. The 28 to 32 range is considered “just right” because people in this stage typically have a stronger sense of self, career stability. They also have a good balance between youthful optimism and emotional maturity.

Marriage in this window means you’ve had enough life experience to make an intentional choice about your partner, but you’re not so set in your ways that adapting to a long-term relationship feels impossible. You’re more emotionally flexible, making cohabitation and compromise feel natural rather than forced.

Is There a ‘Right’ Age To Get Married?

At the end of the day, the best time to get married is whenever you feel ready. Whether that’s in your 20s, your 40s, or never at all—it’s your life, your love story. The key isn’t following a formula but understanding what you need.

A successful marriage isn’t just about timing—it’s about emotional readiness, compatibility, and shared values. So rather than stressing over the “perfect” age, focus on choosing a partner who makes you feel safe, supported, and seen. That’s the real foundation for lasting love.