I stopped giving weight to New Year's Resolutions when I realized that change is something that is inevitable, and that no one person is 100 percent dedicated to upon their first declaration. Yes, so much can happen in a year but so much more sustainable growth can happen when you shift your focus to areas of your life that are crying out for your attention.

Being booked and busy, “flewed out”, having the most beautifully curated feed or any other social stereotypes cannot prepare you to be your best self the way that shifting your intentions can. We all love self-care, right? Word to Alex Elle — a major part of self-care is taking time to assess parts of you that may not be so instagrammable or virtually flawless with the help of a popping filter. No, I’m not trying to kill the fun but really, when was the last time you asked yourself who am I? And why am I doing this? When is the last time that you authentically heart checked yourself?

As a photographer and writer, I can appreciate a good feed — aesthetically pleasing hues and the occasional subliminal captions that has absolutely nothing to do with the scene of the photo. I get it, Instagram is for the highlights and sometimes we get so into it that it can become a part of us. However, what happens when that part of us doesn’t feel so much, like us anymore?

You begin to see a shift and a change, and honestly, it feels as if you are being propelled without warning.

Even in this teach yourself that you do not have to resist and that you are allowed embrace the uncertainty and new life that is on the other side of fear, but of course, that is easier said than done. It is completely natural to be afraid but it is equally beautiful of a transition once you decide to go through the hard parts. We speak of allowance, compassion and grace almost subconsciously, but rarely do we ever allow it when it comes to our personal journey. 

You must take your personal goals, intentions and dreams just as serious as you do for those around you. I mean, if you aren’t rooting for you then who will? Cheer for yourself in a way that breathes magic into your lungs and flutters of joy into your heart, because there is ultimately nothing like some good self-love that radiates from our truest parts. Be willing to give yourself that grace and that compassion to know that you must take everything day by day, and while the big picture is good to have, no masterpiece is painted in a day.

Sisterfriend, today I charge you to break that pattern of habitual and learn new ways that to slow down and love yourself without a deadline, agenda or the urgency of an internal clock. Essentially, tap into that personal development because there is a woman ready to emerge from your journey. Your life was already crafted before you arrived at this place and before you made the plans, so when things in life appear unstable trust that there is a divine plan set out for your good. 


Ready. Set. Boss. Our daily email is pouring out inspiration with the latest #BlackGirlBossUp moments, tips on hair, beauty and lifestyle to get you on track to a better you! Sign up today.

compassionpersonal developmentgracepersonal growthboss womannew year's resolutions