When your sexual chemistry with someone is electric, it’s hard to stay rational. This kind of intimate connection can be rare to find, making you unwilling to lose it. It may have you straying from your morals, sacrificing your needs or staying in a relationship that doesn’t ultimately serve you.
The pegs the question is good sex worth staying in a bad relationship? Do you feel shame around prioritizing pleasure over your emotional needs? Here’s how to navigate the dilemma.
Is Good Sex Worth Staying in a Bad Relationship?
It’s common to find yourself physically compatible with someone who may not be good for you in other ways. They may know how to tend to your body sexually, while leaving you neglected emotionally. If you find yourself in a relationship that has sparks in the bedroom yet feels dull otherwise, here are some questions to ask yourself to truly evaluate if it’s worth staying in:
Am I abandoning my needs?
Sure, your sexual needs may be met. However, it’s important to think about your mental, emotional and psychological needs. In order to maintain longevity in a relationship, you need to be tended to across the board. When one self abandons, they completely lose touch with their own needs, values, and sense of self in order to maintain the relationship. If you’ve been abandoned by your partner or abandoned yourself within the partnership, then you’re doing a grave injustice to yourself.
What am I left with outside of intimacy?
Take a step back and survey your relationship. Ask yourself if you take the sex away, what are you left with? Are there redeeming aspects to the relationship that make it worth the long haul? Is there still romance, healthy communication, the potential for a long-term commitment or is there only strife and strain otherwise?
How did the relationship start?
Was the relationship fulfilling beyond intimacy at some point? Were you romantically connected once? If so, you know that you and this person have the ability to connect beyond just the physical. With communication and intention, you can make your way back there. While sex may be where things are the most electric now, you can work to reignite the fire elsewhere.
What advice would I give my friends?
If your best friend who you loved and adored came to you with this same situation, what would you advise her to do? Would you tell her the sacrifice is worth it, or urge her to trust in the possibility of meeting someone who will tend to her heart and body all the same? It’s likely that you’d want the best for your friend, so feel worthy enough to apply that same rhetoric to yourself.