Rejection can have a jarring impact on your self-esteem, especially when that rejection comes from a close friend. Sometimes, friendships end unexpectedly and suddenly. Although it will hurt, there is life on the other side of rejection. Give yourself space and grace to grieve the friendship ending and move forward. Here are five tips to heal from a friendship rejection.

Acknowledge What You’re Feeling

There’s a time in life to put on your big girl pants, wear a brave face, and soldier on. This is not one of them. After a friendship rejection, allow yourself space to feel your emotions. Whether it be shock, disappointment, hurt, loss, anger, confusion, or a cocktail of those emotions, it’s healthy to feel those emotions and not pretend you’re OK when you’re not. (Protip: Eventually, you will be OK and move to the other side of this rejection.) 

Take Ownership Where You Can

Rejection can leave you feeling helpless. Once you acknowledge how you feel, it is important for you to take ownership of your actions and emotions. By doing so, you won’t allow the rejection to own you. Be honest with yourself about your shortcomings or mistakes you may have made or if you did not drop the ball, take ownership of that as well. 

Let Go of What You Cannot Control

On the other side of taking ownership and cleaning up your side of the street, it’s essential to let go of the things that are outside of your control. You are not responsible for another person’s emotions or actions. Rejections are often less about us, and more so about another person’s insecurities, wounds, and ways of thinking. These things are out of your control, and it’s essential to not personalize rejection and know when to let it go.

Separate the Rejection From Your Identity

Your identity is not tied up in any relationship. So if a person decides to walk away, know that this is not a reflection of your intrinsic value or worth. You have to know who you are outside of any friendship or relationship.

Turn Your Focus to the Friendships You Do Have

Lastly, in order to help you move on from a friendship rejection, lean into gratitude by focusing on the friendships you do have. Be present. Don’t focus so much on the friendship that ended that you lose sight of the beautiful and thriving friendships around you.