Have you ever found yourself blindsided by emotional distance from someone you love that’s living with bipolar disorder? If so, you’re not alone. Many people in relationships with partners managing bipolar disorder find themselves confused, heartbroken, or blaming themselves when their partner pulls away. These moments can feel deeply personal, but they rarely are.
Whether you’re navigating a mental health challenge in your relationship or learning how to communicate through disconnection, you deserve support and clarity. Here’s what you should know about why your partner with bipolar disorder pushing you away. From how to move through the pain with compassion and clarity to understanding when is the right time to seek outside help, here’s a detailed breakdown of this phenomenon.
Why Might Someone With Bipolar Disorder Push Their Partner Away?
Loving someone with bipolar disorder can be both deeply rewarding and uniquely challenging, especially during emotional episodes. Bipolar disorder is characterized by mood swings that include depressive lows and manic or hypomanic highs. During these episodes, a person may experience intense feelings of guilt, irritability, impulsivity, or detachment. These changes in mood and perception can lead someone to push loved ones away.
They wouldn’t be pushing you away because they don’t care. In fact it would be the complete opposite. A person who loves you and is living with bipolar disorder may push you away because they care too much about you. They may not want to see you get hurt from something that is out of their control.
If your partner pushed you away, they likely did so because of something they’re dealing with internally. It is not because of anything you did. Their actions reflect their struggles, but it doesn’t impact their love for you, nor does it show a lack of love or desire for you.
Why This Happens: The Emotional Reasons Behind the Push
People with bipolar disorder might pull away for several deeply rooted psychological or emotional reasons. These actions often reflect internal chaos more than external conflict. Here are a few to look out for:
- Self-stigma and shame: They may feel “too much” or “not enough,” especially during depressive lows, and withdraw to protect you from what they’re feeling.
- Manic misjudgment: In a manic or hypomanic state, a person might impulsively seek space, freedom, or stimulation and see closeness as suffocating. This can happen even if they felt comforted by those same actions days before.
- Fear of being misunderstood: The complexity of bipolar episodes can lead to feelings of alienation. They may think, “You can’t possibly understand me right now, so I’d rather be alone.”
- Emotional overwhelm: Even love can feel overwhelming when their nervous system is dysregulated by mood shifts.
How to Navigate a Partner Pushing You Away
It’s natural to feel hurt or rejected when your partner becomes distant, but you can still honor your own needs while offering empathy.
First, don’t chase or force closeness in moments of withdrawal. Instead, affirm your presence gently. Next, tend to your own emotional boundaries. Journal how their actions made you feel, talk to a trusted friend or consider therapy. Supporting someone with bipolar disorder does not mean abandoning yourself.
Lastly, educate yourself about bipolar disorder. Understanding what your partner is experiencing can turn confusion into compassion.
How Can I Support a Partner With Bipolar Disorder Without Losing Myself?
Supporting someone with bipolar disorder starts with self-awareness. You can’t pour into your partner with an empty cup, and you shouldn’t have to.
Start setting emotional boundaries by taking breaks when you feel drained and asking for clarity when you’re confused. Validate your partner’s emotions, but also don’t feel responsible for fixing them. Encourage treatment, whether that’s therapy, medication, or lifestyle support. Always remember, you’re their partner, not their therapist.
Why Does Bipolar Disorder Impact Relationships So Deeply?
Bipolar disorder impacts relationships deeply because it disrupts things. The symptoms of bipolar disorder, include mood instability, impulsivity and withdrawal. Since love doesn’t exist in a vacuum, the intimacy, and safety of the relationship is affected by these symptoms.
When to Seek Outside Help
Therapy isn’t just for crises. It’s a tool for connection and clarity. You might want to seek couples therapy or individual counseling if:
- Your partner frequently withdraws without explanation.
- You feel confused, gaslit, or emotionally unsafe.
- You’re carrying emotional burdens alone.
- There’s emotional manipulation or verbal abuse present.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is It Normal To Feel Hurt When My Partner With Bipolar Disorder Pulls Away? Yes. Your feelings are valid. Emotional distance from a loved one always hurts, especially when it’s sudden.
Can a Relationship Survive Bipolar Disorder? Absolutely. With communication, treatment, and mutual effort, many relationships not only survive, but thrive.
Should I Give My Partner Space or Keep Trying To Talk? Give space when requested, but leave the door open. A simple “I’m here when you’re ready” can be powerful.