Self-love is one of the best kinds of love we can ever receive and give ourselves. Oftentimes, society has pushed narratives that say we need to strive to be in relationships with others, while seamlessly needing to follow a constraining rulebook of other areas in our lives. We’re oftentimes told so many stories of what “having it figured out'' looks like" when in reality, “not having anything figured out,” is in fact a simpler way of life then we’ve actually made it to be. Becoming your biggest asset is by far more important than any relationship with another person. When you are able to become your own lover, your own best friend, and are able to garner a healthy and loving relationship with yourself first, this is one of the best ways you can actually attract the person you’re ultimately meant to be with, and not just that, the person that will help you to reach your highest potential as an add on to your life rather than being the source of your life.
It’s easy for the term “self-love” to become a scary phrase, as it’s often attributed to being alone, and in a way, being able to enjoy your own company. In many ways, however, self love is something that should always be celebrated rather than a construct that should be feared. It’s an opportunity for you to really get to know the person behind the mirror. What are ways you can fill your own cup, outside of how another may be able to fill it for you? What are ways you can give back to yourself and embrace your own company? Do you like going on solo dates alone? Where or what would those dates look like? What are ways you can build a better relationship with self and what are ways you can feel content being alone and in your own space?
I think it’s important to recognize the difference between being alone and being lonely.
Being alone means that you are merely embracing and masking in the presence of your own company, whereas, being lonely can mean something completely opposite. You may feel isolated from others or unattached. You may feel there aren't any people you truly consider to be close with, or even people you can truly trust. Hear this, being lonely is actually an illusion. It’s a state of mind that we’ve subconsciously created ourselves. We’re never actually alone and we’re never actually lonely. Once you can get to a place where you’ve built that relationship with yourself, one that is based on respect, respect for your body, your eating habits, your physical habits, mental habits, and even spirituality, you will start to feel more in touch with the universe around you, and will start to feel less “alone” or “lonely.” Oftentimes, when we fear these terms, it really means that we fear ourselves. When we’re able to truly mask in the energy of oneness, of everything being you and yourself, the real fear will no longer become being alone, but rather; the fear of having others diminish the home you’ve built within yourself, the fear of others destroying that inner peace inside of you, and the fear of toxic and low vibrational relationships that do not fuel our soul, but our ego of needing to fill a missing void- the void we’ve attributed to be “loneliness.”
Let me start off by saying that self-love is in fact the missing void you’ve been in search of filling.
We’ve spent so much of our lives believing that our external environment is the only way that can make us happy or joyful. This is false. Everything you need is already inside of you, even if it’s hard to see it, we are more than capable of giving ourselves the love we so constantly crave from others. We can really become the people we lean on to always be there at the end of the day. Self-love is a power within itself and once you're able to unlock the power and embrace it to the fullest, watch and see how much your entire life will change. The world will become your oyster, and you, the magician.