As human beings, and especially women, sometimes it’s challenging not to care what people think. It seems like a lot of people always seem to have an opinion on women no matter what, from what we should do with our reproduction to how to wear our hair. It can be difficult not to care, but there are ways to accomplish a “zero f**** given mentality.”
One of the most empowering things you can ever do is to invest in yourself, and while this may look different for different people, make up your mind to invest in and educate yourself on something that you truly care about. Educating yourself in topics that interest you is a great way to boost confidence within yourself and tone out external validation.
Accept That People Will Always Have An Opinions About You
As much as we would all like to be loved, the truth is that not everyone will love you. You are not for everyone, which means that it is inevitable that people will judge you or have an opinion of you no matter what you do. Instead of wasting headspace worrying about what another person thinks of you, why not focus on accepting that people will always talk?
Be Around People Who Support and Accept You
The energy and vibe you surround yourself with are so important. Your tribe is extremely important in building a solid, self-assured core within yourself. When you have people around you who know and understand what you’re about, then it becomes easy to tune out negative external opinions.
Expect to be Criticized
We live in a brutal world, and the reality is that not everyone will praise your efforts or commend your hard work. The best way to stop fixating and essentially become numb to any form of criticism is to train your mind to expect the worst type of criticism. That way, it won’t be so jarring when you get harshly criticized or “torn apart.”
Don't Read The Negative Comments
If you are a writer, celebrity, or in a line of work that requires an online presence, you may notice that sometimes, comments and reviews can be scathing. We are human and ultimately will feel the effect of negative comments, but the best way to get past this and tone out the negativity for your good is not to engage.
Ask Yourself Why
Many people care what others think of them because they grew up with a hyper-critical parent who crushed their self-esteem or some other part of their childhood was traumatic. No matter what the reason is, it is worth searching within to try and figure out why you react to criticism the way you do, and if you can’t figure it out, consider connecting with a therapist who can help.
Do Something That Wildly Challenges You
Doing something that is wildly out of your element is an excellent way to grow a thick skin and become unconcerned with what anyone thinks of you. A challenge might look different from one person to the next, but take some time to identify what a challenge is for you and hone in on doing it repeatedly and consistently. This will ultimately shift your focus and push you to look within for validation.
Don't Ask For Permission
There are probably certain people in your life who can’t wait for the opportunity to share their unwanted advice and opinions with you. Develop the habit of not asking for permission, but instead, just doing whatever you want to do without telling anyone until it is done. If you need advice on an important issue, ask a trusted person or professional. It is so important to be careful who you open up to because confiding in the wrong person can leave you feeling drained, unnerved, and without confidence.