Black women supporting one another has always been a flex, but it wasn’t until last week that I truly experienced it. A week ago, I walked through a crowded grocery store with the single goal of getting all of the items that I had put on the grocery list and hurriedly getting out of there. I had on my red weave, a look that I had considered my signature look for a while. I had gotten used to getting stares in public when I would go out and would often ignore them completely, but it seemed different that day at the store. While picking up a gallon of water from one of the aisles, I noticed a pair of eyes on me. As I wheeled my cart away, I heard someone calling out for my attention.
“Excuse me?” It was the woman who had been looking at me seconds ago, and she happened to be a Black woman.
I stopped pushing my cart to look at her and smile in ways that we politely smile at strangers in public places.
“I love your hair. It’s beautiful. Gorgeous,” she said.
“Thank you so much,” I said back to her as I smiled and walked toward self-checkout.
As I approached the self-checkout line, I noticed that quite a few people were also looking at my red hair. I scanned a pack of gum as I smiled at one of them.
Two more Black women walked up to me to say that they loved my hair and thought it was beautiful.
It seemed like I was walking on clouds for the rest of the evening. Society teaches us not to seek external validation. While it is true that we should find validation within ourselves, there is something to be said about Black women uplifting each other.
Although society and pop culture often portray Black women as confrontational and aggressive toward each other, when they support one another, it is a flex.
Black women are undoubtedly the flyest, sharpest and savviest people on the planet. In a world where all odds seem to be stacked against Black women, they have managed to be resilient, successful and highly fashionable. When the world refuses to honor and recognize the numerous achievements and values that Black women bring to the table, then it is up to Black women to uplift themselves and fix their crowns. My experience at the grocery store, no matter how mundane, made me realize that having Black women in your corner is nothing short of powerful. The support of another Black woman is not only uplifting; it feels validating. More Black women complimenting each other is the proverbial pat on the back that we all need. It is beyond healing as we deal with the unnecessary stressors that Black women have to face in a society that continues to tell us that they we unworthy — because the truth is we are worthy, and what better way to emphasize that than telling it to each other?