Savoring the moment and alone-time is everything when it comes to deepening friendship bonds. At least, that’s what ‘quality time’ love language folks say. Do you have friends who take brunch dates seriously and seem to schedule the next one before you’ve parted ways? Big hello, quality time love language. It could be sitting in comfortable silence together or kekeing all night for hours on end, the quality time has to be impeccable. And better yet, it also has to be well maintained.
The quality time guys and gals in your friendship group pay attention to details. This means they’ll notice if you keep canceling or postponing plans, leave all the planning up to them, or don’t make time in your calendar to spend time with them (and group outings don’t count!) As a love language, the vibe is very much high-quality, personal experiences spent together. You might notice that quality time love language people want to feel like they are valuable in your life, which is quite a hard thing to assess or ask upfront. In this sense, it takes some skill and listening to find what makes these friends know, without prompting, how much they mean to you.
Is it necessary to learn your friends’ love languages?
The Love Languages were coined by Dr. Gary Chapman who wrote the book and devised a quiz on the five different ways that individuals typically feel loved. Learning your friends’ love languages is a must if you want to build long-lasting, meaningful bonds. Love languages are indicative of how people feel most loved: most people have primary and secondary love language(s). For your quality time love language friend, they’ll likely feel loved when you set aside time to show them they’re important to you. Remember that it’s likely that how someone receives love is how they prefer to express it, although sometimes it differs.
Read on to discover how to demonstrate love in the form of quality time like a pro.
Do these 5 things for the quality time love language friends in your life
Invite them over for an at-home ‘happy hour’
You can’t go wrong with happy hour. Whether classic cocktails or mocktails, for the sober-curious or non-alcohol-drinking friends, this will be a treat. Prepare the drinks together while spending quality time away from noisy bars so you can truly catch up.
Sunset drives and perfectly curated playlists
Summertime is here and summer’s night drives are unbeatable, to be honest. Curate a playlist together, pack snacks, pick a destination, and go for that drive.
Create a distraction-free zone together
Avoiding distractions is key when it comes to making your quality time people feel appreciated. It is a good idea to put the phones aside and go somewhere where there aren’t glaring reminders of life’s responsibilities outside of the present moment. Other things that go a long way include eye contact and expressing interest in what they have to say.
This love language is about deep diving, asking questions that encourage vulnerability, and showing up entirely – emotionally, physically, spiritually and mentally. In this case, if you’re feeling unable to concentrate or indulge in a substantial, high-quality conversation, it might be worth shifting the meeting to something that won’t leave them feeling unloved. I.e. it might be better to have a movie night or go to listen to live music where there is more stimulation that won’t take away from quality time and shared interests.
Run errands together
Quality time doesn’t mean fun or luxury 100% of the time. So long as you make it worthwhile, it counts. Run errands, catch up, and be in the midst of real life with each other. Also, this is one for those whose primary love language isn’t necessarily quality time. If you’re prone to drifting off while people are talking or sometimes feel overwhelmed by deep dives and long conversations, running errands is a great alternative. Show your bestie that they have your full attention while getting stuff done.
Long-distance quality time
This is for the long-distance loves in your life who you want to be close to in spirit. Quality time is transferable to the digital space too. Spread the love by establishing a routine together, such as ending the evening by streaming your favorite show together or FaceTiming while you do your evening skincare. You could also plan the next road trip or international trip together, read a book at the same time or listen to a podcast. The options are endless to keep the friendship fresh and actively show interest in your lives and personalities.
Related: Creative Ways To Show Up For Your ‘Gifts’ Love Language Friend