There is nothing greater than claiming your soft era entirely. While wellness trends come and go, it appears that living softly is here to stay. For many Black women, the idea of living a soft life felt very far away given societal expectations and narratives about Black femininity. Along came the ‘Soft Life’ which took over the feeds and minds of Black women across the diaspora. The beauty of this moment in time is that it isn’t a moment, but a lifestyle that has the potential to shift the culture of generationally overworked and exhausted Black women. 

What is a Soft Era?

A soft life is essentially living a life rooted in rest. It can take many shapes. Black women’s existence is not a monolith, but actually gloriously wide-reaching. The term ‘soft life’ was originally coined in the Nigerian Influencer community and was used to show Black women living in unshakeable comfort. It may look like setting boundaries, indulging in and feeling worthy of luxury trips and treats or a rich inner life. It also could mean afternoon naps, therapy or embracing body positivity. In essence, wherever there is ease, there is soft living. Your soft era is a commitment to a shift in mentality that chooses gentler ways of being instead of struggle. It’s a pretty exciting generational shift for Black women collectively. At the same time, Black women are rewriting their lived experience so that they become accustomed to, and magnetics for, softness as the new norm. 

Here are some pointers on how to maintain and advocate for your peace through all seasons of your soft era.

Romantic relationships

It’s giving: stress-free love, great sex, embracing the beauty of your single period

Exuding soft energy in your romantic relationships is also a part of your soft era. Showing up for your partner in vulnerability and having it reciprocated leads to a level of care and softness that we simply love to see. With Black women often feeling excluded from mainstream representations of the lovable and desirable protagonist, it is time to lean all the way into your main character energy. Whether you buy them for yourself or you get surprised with a fresh batch, you deserve all the roses in this new era. Why not create a movie moment with this projector to elevate a classic movie night into something unapologetically romantic? This Happrun projector is perfect for movie nights as it provides 40-200 inch projection display. The portable projector comes with bluetooth functions and HD resolution.

We see it: cushions and comfy bedding laid out, candles lit, soft lighting in the corner, your favorite snacks and treats, a bottle of your favorite beverage on deck, and a projector ready for the smoothest movie date night a soft one like yourself could ask for.  

Personal life

It’s giving: positive self-talk, a ‘me-time’ morning routine, grace when things (you) get messy

If a tended-to heart and home space doesn’t give soft era then we don’t know what does. Investing in your inner-world is a crucial part of the process. Some examples include creating a home space that feels peaceful, going to therapy or even living a slower, more intentional life. It’s all a process and it doesn’t happen overnight. The trick is to be kind to yourself and allow room for mistakes and messy days. Start by creating softness through routines. Creating a self-care ceremony out of your bath-time is an ideal place to begin. A bath tray with your favorite candle or smudge smudge stick with some rose petals in the tub sounds like a lush way to honor your me-time. This extendable bath tray gives the full spa experience. The bamboo bath tray is adjustable to fit bath tubs of all sizes. It also a non-slip tray to maximize the chill vibes.

Work and finances

It’s giving: Vacations pre-booked, blocking out time to rest in your calendar, getting comfortable asking for more

Black women often find themselves underpaid and overworked and the soft era comes to reverse just this. Being well-rested is valuable. Putting boundaries in place, while at first may be uncomfortable, is necessary. Whether you work from a home office or go to a physical place of work, your environment should also reflect your soft interior. Whether adding scents, adding quotes or even bringing cushions into the mix, feeling comfort is the bare minimum. While you transition from boss babe to soft girl, pick some items that keep your office as soft as you. This petal desk chair is ergonomically ideal but also keeps your working environment soft-inspired. Make working from home cute again. The chair comes in a range of colors and is adjustable.


It’s giving: Feeling sexy, self-affirming habits, health is wealth

There aren’t many things in the world that make up for feeling self-loved-up. While in your soft era, take the time to indulge in self-affirming habits that make you feel loved exactly as you need. There is nothing like some delicate, sexy lingerie to boost your confidence. Remember, wearing lingerie doesn’t have to be for anyone other than yourself if you don’t want it to be. Savage X Fenty is a go-to for fire lingerie. This Puff Daisy Unlined Bustier is sure to make you feel instantly sexy. The combination between florals and mint green makes for a gorgeous combination. This bustier comes with a sheer fabric with interior boning for a structured fit.

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It’s giving: friend dates, transparency, releasing what no longer aligns

Attracting friends who also live a soft life is super helpful while on your journey. Working on healthy friendships that are drama-free really does something special to the nervous system. It’s also a way to ensure that even when you need reminding of your soft mantras, you always have someone to motivate you. The Mindsight Buddha Meditation tool is designed to help slow your breathing and promote mindfulness. It uses fade-in and fade-out colors to help promote mindful breath. This is an idea for gifting your friend a gentle daily reminder to dip into breath.

Related: Get Your Soft-Life Essentials From These Black-Owned Health and Wellness Brands

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